Well, the guys on ESPN this morning said her nickname was A-Rod, so that's what I'm going with.

The whole thing got me thinking about what other great animal-related sports rivalry stories are out there waiting to happen. Here’s what I would love to see happen:

A meat packer is taking a hike through the woods on a long camping trip. Even though he’s been away from work for days, he still smells like raw meat (he’s been working at this meat plant for a long time, see). Well, off in the woods there’s a bear who smells raw meat walking through the woods. The bear rushes toward the packer, who is forced to rely on whatever stray parts from his backpack that he can rely on to defend himself. It all works out in the end, though, because while the bear is big and mean, it’s really only good at defending itself and has absolutely no ability when trying to take the offensive. The packer, meanwhile, does is merely OK on both offense and defense, but benefits from the lack of any actual competition on the Bear’s part.

Eventually the packer figures things out and gets the bear off of him. He makes a mad dash toward his car but trips in the parking lot. Somewhere in the distance, a Norwegian man cries because he's not strong or smart enough to compete with either the packer or the bear.

That would be a great story, but it would be even better if the guy made it to his car and retired, er, drove out of the park on top.